


Friendship Caught on Fire

by jdjunkie



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Drabble Collection, Episode Related, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-30
Updated: 2013-06-30
Packaged: 2017-12-16 15:55:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/863848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jdjunkie/pseuds/jdjunkie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of 11 drabbles charting Jack and Daniel's relationship through the years.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Friendship Caught on Fire

**Author's Note:**

> Each of the first ten drabbles is episode-related. The last is post-series. I may have subverted the prompt of "firelight" to some degree. Is that not the beauty of promptage? ;-)

Daniel’s burning. Again. He’s consumed by flames and it’s just as hellish this time as it has been every other time the images have played out behind Jack’s closed eyes.

He sits up in bed, ramrod straight, heart pounding.

He’s lost people before. It comes with the territory. You deal with it, move on. But this time it feels different. This is _Daniel._ And it feels as though Jack has broken his sacred rule - he’s left someone behind. Impossible, though. Daniel’s dead.

Still, he can’t shake the feeling. And the suspicion that he’s left a piece of his heart behind, too.

> 

They’re sitting round a small fire, just the four of them, away from the rest of the prisoners’ prying eyes, when Jack’s eyes are drawn to the marks on Daniel neck. The bruising is livid and offensive. Every so often, Daniel touches the skin in the kind of abstracted way he strokes the spines of books.

It’s at that moment that Jack realizes he’s spending rather too much time watching Daniel’s hands. Watching Daniel, full stop. Here, he has an excuse; it’s dangerous. He has to be watchful.

He can tell himself that. Make all the excuses he wants. Yeah, right.

>> 

Daniel is back with his team and all should be well. Ma’chello’s bugs are history. But the fire in Daniel’s eyes is out.

Daniel is MIA.

“Let’s eat,” Jack says, plonking the bag of Thai takeout on Daniel’s kitchen counter.

“I’m not hungry.”

“I am, and I hate to eat alone. Plays havoc with the digestion.”

Daniel leans in and sniffs the bag’s contents. The first real sign of interest in anything Jack’s seen in days.

“You don’t have to do this. I’m fine.”

Jack smiles. “Sure you are.”

He’s not but he will be. Jack will make damned sure of it.

>>> 

“I’ve seen what happens to a Me who loses a You, Daniel. A light goes out.”

“You can’t do this.”

“Don’t hide behind that. My decision. I want this. I want _you_.”

“It’s just because your robot double lost his Daniel. You saw that and now he’s in your head. We’re not them. I need to know you want me for _me_.”

“I can’t remember when I first wanted you. I’ve always wanted you.”

“We hurt each other in so many ways, Jack. We can’t let this be another.”

“We won’t. We love each other, Daniel. Time to be in love.”

>>>> 

It’s a summer evening but Jack lights the fire in his living room anyway. He’s cold. He sits on the floor in front of the fireplace and watches the flames dance and play. This house, that’s only a home when Daniel’s in it, is empty.

He takes a pull of his beer and it makes him colder. That’s okay. A frozen heart can’t feel anything.

Daniel’s gone, and the love and life they shared has gone with him.

It’s hard to know where to go from here. Daniel’s not here to tell him.

He sits until the fire fades to ashes.

>>>>> 

It’s kind of hard to be professional when your heart is dancing like the shadow of a flame on the wall.

Hammond has been asking gentle questions for about ten minutes. Jack’s been answering as best he can. Some of it’s a little hazy - the pain of the knives isn’t - but he remembers enough to make a decent report.

Fraiser’s hovering in a way that says Hammond will be ejected pretty soon.

Jack says what needs to be said, but his heart is saying the same thing over and over ... _Daniel’s not gone, Daniel’s not gone ..._

>>>>>> 

Teal’c’s quarters. Jack stands in the open doorway and hesitates. He’s here uninvited but he couldn’t stay away. He guesses Teal’c and Daniel have talked; that they’re finally back on track after Daniel’s absence. Now, they’re sitting in silence, deep in the kind of meditation Jack wishes he could have used while Daniel was gone.

Daniel looks ... beautiful ... in the candlelight. He still has his crow’s feet. Still has the furrow between his eyes that deepens when he frowns and vanishes when he laughs.

This is what yearning is.

Daniel doesn’t remember them.

This is what hell is.

>>>>>>> 

“Leda had hair like fire.”

“Good for her.” He doesn’t want to talk about Leda.

“Beautiful cascade of curls.”

“Really.” He’s not jealous.

“She came on to me.”

“Did she now? Wanted to play helpless patient and competent nurse, did she?” Stop sounding like an idiot.

“I turned her down.”

“Oh?”

“Because I love someone else.”

Crap.

“I remember, Jack. I remember it all.”

He daren’t hope that means what he wants it to mean.

“You’re an amazing kisser and even better at giving head.”

Now he lets himself hope.

“Wanna do both? Now?”

Daniel’s smile lights up Jack’s world.

>>>>>>>> 

“Tell me you don’t hate yourself.”

 Daniel’s sighs into the phone. It’s a “don’t push me on this” sigh. “I don’t.”

“That the truth?”

“Yes.”

 “You pumped Khalek full of bullets.”

“I did.”

“And you don’t hate yourself?”

“No.” There’s silence and then Daniel says, so softly, “I miss you, Jack.”

“That is entirely mutual.”

“One day, it won’t have to be like this.”

They’ve said variations of that so many times. They’re words to hang onto.

“I’m keeping the home fires burning, baby.”

He can feel Daniel’s smile through the phone, across the miles.

“Keep stokin’ Jack. Keep stokin’.”

>>>>>>>>> 

He tells Jack about the fires of Celestis, about Adria and everything that went with the Prior experience. Words tumble out, falling all over each other in their rush to be gone. Jack listens, holding him through the unburdening which Daniel only allows himself in the safety of their bed.

Finally, Daniel lapses into silence.

“Let it go,” Jack says, pulling Daniel in closer, mouthing the words into his hair, sweat-soaked from their lovemaking.

“I don’t know if I can,” Daniel whispers.

And just like that, Jack decides. It’s time. They’ve paid their dues.

Their war has to be over.

>>>>>>>>>> 

“You know, your eyes are beautiful in firelight.”

Jack can’t stop being affectionate or saying all those things he never thought he’d hear himself saying out loud.

“I would say ‘you’re full of it’ but I like it when you can’t help yourself.”

Daniel’s eyes are sparkling in the reflected flames of the cabin’s fireplace. His skin is honey-toned, smooth and tempting. They’re lying naked on a comforter dragged from their bed in a moment of “we can if we want” daring.

“Get used to it,” Jack says, smiling. “I’ve burned for you for years. Time to show not tell.”

 


End file.
